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It’s hard to believe that through all the technological breakthroughs, long-distance sex is still pretty much the same as it was in 1876 when Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone so women could describe their ankles to guys over the phone. But phone sex can really feel like that if you don’t know what you’re doing.

Lauren suggests “setting the stage” with a quick call or flirty text that will make your partner really look forward to talking with you.

Try sending off a “can’t wait to hear your voice tonight,” to leave them wanting more.

It helps if you’re already turned on before you talk on the phone.

That way, you’re not going from, “Listen to this annoying ass thing that happened to me at the grocery store today,” to “you like that?

Say something like, “I confess I’ve always wanted you to go down on me while I rant about that totally passive aggressive thing my roommate did” or “I confess that I fantasize about understanding what a vaginal orgasm feels like.” Finding out your partner’s “confessions” are, can be great fodder for future phone sex fantasies.

Maybe you hate the outdoors and would never in a million years be caught doing watersports.

Let’s say, you really love the fantasy of public sex, but you know, don’t have any actual plans to follow through on that.

Phone sex is a great and safe place to talk about the things you wouldn’t or couldn’t do in real life.

“Imagine if we were at an elegant restaurant, and you were under the table cloth, eating me out while the waiter took our order.” or, “what if we were at a party full of sexy people and they all just started f*cking in front of us?

You know what I’m going to do to you, but I’m not doing it fast enough.

Make me believe you want it, more than air, more than water.

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